Funny Dog Quotes From the Quirky to the Hilarious

Funny Dog Quotes From the Quirky to the Hilarious:

1. “I’m not a dog!

I’m a man!” – Charlie Brown

2. “You’re so mean.

” – Pooh Bear

3. “My name’s not mean, it’s just.

..funny.” – Oscar the Grouch

4. “He doesn’t like me because I smile too much” – Mr.


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5. “That’s my job!

” – Homer Simpson

6. “It’s not a crime to laugh at one’s self.

” – Woody Woodpecker

7. “Don’t worry, I won’t bite.

” – Scrat

8. “If you don’t laugh, you cry” – Winnie the Pooh

9. “I’m gonna go get myself another beer” – Barney Stinson

10. “The only thing worse than being right is being boring.” – Voltaire

11. “

What do you think? Is this a joke?”

– Homer Simpson

12. “There are no second acts in American lives” – Bill Cosby

13. “Homer, if you want to live forever, eat a rat.” – Ned Flanders

14. “I’ll tell ya what, let’s have some fun today!” – Homer Simpson

15. “You can’t please everyone, so you’ve got to please yourself.” – Mason Cooley

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16. “Come on!

Let’s go!” – Pinnochio

17. “

When are you going to learn that I’m never wrong?”

– Blackadder

18. “The key to happiness is to lower your expectations.” – George Carlin

19. “I’m a bear, you know” – Baloo

20. “I’m a human and I don’t like to be called an animal.” – Calvin

21. “Life’s uncertain; eat dessert first” – Ernestine Ulmer

22. “You’re never too old to do stupid things.” – Forrest Gump

23. “I see you’ve chosen the path of least resistance.” – David Xanatos

24. “Never judge a man by his haircut.” – Zebediah Tucker

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25. “Thank you for blessing me with this wonderful meal.” – Olaf

26. “I’ve got a million of ’em!” – Raggedy Ann

27. “Life’s like a box of chocolates; it doesn’t last long and you never know what you’re gonna get” – Forrest Gump

28. “We’re all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars” – Oscar Wilde

29. “I must not break their hearts” – Pinocchio

30. “We’ve been through a lot together; you, me and this gun.” – John Matrix

31. “Every day, when I wake up, I thank the good Lord I’m Welsh” – Ryan Giggs

32. “You stay classy, San Diego” – The Wolfman

33. “If you want to be happy, be.” – Gollum

34. “I’m a woman – I can have a horse’s head and no one would think twice about it.” – Helena Bonham Carter

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35. “I’m so hungry I could eat a mule!” – John the Gun

36. “I’m gonna marry that girl” – Steve Rogers

37. “

What’s the worst that could happen?”

– Ed

38. “

What’s the point of being a space ranger if you don’t get to say things like ‘it’s life or death mission to save the galaxy’ once in awhile?”

– Johnny Rico

39. “I’m never going to get married” – Jack Dawson

40. “Go back to bed, I had a nightmare” – Mufasa

41. “

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?”

– The Joker

42. “This is the best day ever!” – Gus Grissom

43. “Tragedy is when I cut my finger.

Comedy is when you fall off a cliff and die.” – Mel Brooks

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44. “

What do you mean you can’t find your clothes?”

– Snow White

45. “

Have you seen my wagon?”

– Thomas the Tank Engine

46. “Hakuna Matata” – Timon

47. “You’ve got red on you” – Gollum

48. “I’m not afraid of the fall, I’m afraid of the crash when I get to the bottom” – Peter Pan

49. “

Why does nobody ever listen to me?”

– Olive Hoover

50. “You’ll never find a man more devoted to you than I am” – Will Turner

51. “Let me go or I’ll scream!” – Mary Poppins

52. “I’m not afraid.

I’m never afraid.” – Peter Pan

53. “Your kid has a big mouth” – Renly Baratheon

54. “

Why don’t you put a sock in it?”

– Gollum

55. “It’s just a cut, I’ve had worse” – Mike Tyson

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56. “If you die, our plan dies with you and you die” – Olaf

57. “Go ahead, run away.

That’s what you’re good at isn’t it?”

– Gollum

58. “

Why are the innocent always the first to die?”

– Gollum

59. “I wish we could stay here forever” – Peter Pan

60. “Go Right Ahead!

After all, it’s your funeral” – Judge Turpin

61. “We’re not so different, you and I.” – The Joker

62. “It’s none of their business” – Luke

63. “None of us are getting out of here alive” – Jim

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64. “I’m the king of the world!” – Jack Dawson

65. “

Why couldn’t you have just stayed lost?”

– Tinkerbell

66. “The last real Viking!” – Eric the Red

67. “He’s not my boyfriend” – Wendy Moira Angela Darling

68. “I’m not cut out for this” – John Coffey

69. “Life’s unfair, now go do what I pay you to do” – Mr.


70. “You can’t imagine the things I’ve seen” – William Bligh

71. “Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not.

Make it your strength. Then it can never be your weakness. Armour yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.” – Tyrion

72. “I’m not locked in here with you, you’re locked in here with me!” – The Joker

73. “I can’t take any more of this” – Edmond Dantes

74. “Friends help you get ou of mud.

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Real friends help you get out of hell.” – John Coffey

75. “This is the day we’ve been waiting for!” – Captain Jack Sparrow

76. “I told you we were drinking too much…” – Captain Jack Sparrow

77. “Oh, I have been to hell…and back” – Captain Jean-Luc Picard

78. “You’re going to come down here and face me like a man!” – John Proctor

79. “I’m just a simple soldier, I’m far from home.

I get frightened, I get scared. I make mistakes. But I do my job. My job is to protect United States citizens from foreign threats and political extremists.” – Chris Kyle

80. “Oh, don’t worry.

He’ll find her eventually” – The Count

81. “I’m not a bad man, I’m just a realist” – Judge Turpin

82. “I don’t want to play this game anymore” – Wendy

83. “

What about my bloody tea?”

– John Silver

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84. “I’ve done the impossible, I’ve made this journey to meet with you and propose an alliance between our kingdoms.” – Aladdin

85. “Some things you have to do even if you don’t want to” – Steve Zissou

86. “Getting old is terrible, Jerry.

It’s not the years, it’s the mileage.” – Sir Bedivere

87. “You look like a man who knows what the hell is going on…you look like a man who could use a drink” – The Doctor

88. “You are no king of mine” – The Doctor

89. “It’s the quiet ones you’ve got to watch” – John Proctor

90. “Have no fear, Charles Wallace is here!” – Charles Wallace

91. “This is no fantasy…this is a reality you don’t want to believe” – Unknown

92. “You’ll take this ship out of her or I’ll feed you to the fishes!” – Captain Jack Sparrow

93. “It’s not the years, it’s the mileage” – Obi-Wan Kenobi

94. “I’m not drunk.

I’ve had less than you and I’m not drunk” – Obi-Wan Kenobi

95. “You should never look for things that can’t be found, especially things that don’t exist” – Captain Quirrell

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96. “I’m known for it” – Rhett Butler

97. “He’s a little boy, he’s allowed to be absurd” – The Doctor

98. “I’ll rip that necklace off your dead corpse” – Captain Jack Sparrow

99. “You can call me Anastasia” – Anastasia

100. “I’ve had enough of this place” – Jake Gittes

So there you have it. A huge thank you to all of you who read this and I hope that you liked the list.

If you haven’t seen all the movies mentioned, I urge you to do so. They are all classics. I might do more of these in the future either of Movies, Television or even Video Games. We’ll see.

Until then, take care and keep going to the movies.

– Ian J. Sago

Sources & references used in this article: